In the first section the paper evaluates some of the general criticisms brought forward against the sociological family research, particularly in Werner Schneider's article. Schneider's criticism of family research is judged as being only partially accurate. In the second section a stage model of privacy is developed and some consequences are drawn concerning the relation between privacy and family, couple relationships and individuality. The last section raises the question why the family is still and again a field of controversial sociological discussions and what the function of these discourses is.